You know what’s hard to admit out loud?
That maybe—just maybe—I trained everybody around me to treat me this way.
Not on purpose. Not because I didn’t want love or respect. But because I’ve always been the “just do it myself” type.
The dependable one. The strong one. The fixer.
The “don’t worry, I got it” one.
So I got it.
And I kept getting it.
And now… they expect me to get it. Every time.
And the crazy part is—most of the time, I can do it all.
But now I’m sitting here burnt out, low key resentful, and realizing… this is the monster I created.
I didn’t teach them to help. I taught them to watch.
I didn’t teach them to ask how I’m doing. I taught them to assume I was fine.
I didn’t teach them to love me through action. I taught them that I’d love them, serve them, support them—no matter what.
And let me be clear—I’m not blaming myself to excuse anyone else’s behavior.
I’m just saying: some of the patterns in this house started with me.
Because I was trying to be everything.
Trying to be supermom.
Trying to prove that I could do it all without needing anything in return.
But now I do need something.
I need rest.
I need support.
I need to feel appreciated—not just assumed.
So this is the season where I’m learning to retrain the people around me. Not through yelling. Not through guilt. But by slowly putting some of that weight down. By not doing it all. By asking for help, even if it feels uncomfortable.
Because I can’t keep complaining about what I allow.
And I can’t keep being mad at people for playing the role I wrote for them.
So I’m rewriting it. And this time, I’m in the lead.
Have you ever realized you taught people to lean on you so much they forgot you were leaning too? How did you start to change that? I’m learning how to untrain the patterns I helped build—and it’s hard, but I know it’s necessary.
